- him: what are you doing in class tonight?
- me: making tshirts with City High lyrics
- me: but i don't know what everyone else is going to be doing
- me: probably learning? either way i'm excited!
- him: yeaaaah!
dudeimgettingadell.tumblr.com - a coming of age blog about dorm life and freshman year
bloodboners.tumblr.com - the beauty in this one is the ‘open for interpretation’ of it all. i want this one.
fuckyeahglutenfreediet.tumblr.com - literally.
UDaManNowDawg.tumblr.com - the ultimate personal branding blog. celebrate you!
kentuckyderbylosers.tumblr.com - a graveyard for losers. horse losers. the worst kind of loser.
moeshasmurdermysterymansion.tumblr.com - she should capitalize on her crime. i’d attend a show.
getbusylivinorgetbusyfryin.tumblr.com - a recipe site dedicated to all things soaked in fat
walkthiswade.tumblr.com - a site dedicated to dwayne wade’s swagger and awesome dunk .gifs
despair.tumblr.com - wait nevermind it’s already taken. and its a looping slideshow of my 2010 in pictures.
just a few I thought up while trying to think of a real one for my new project thats going to make me a million dollars. anyways, feel free to use those. but not too free cause, like, i thought of them so paypal me a buck or two. just in case the million gets tied up in investments, ya know?
- Me: I won 5 dolla!
- Dad: Denny’s grand slam $4.95!!
some punk that i roughed up way back
coming back after all these years
rat tat tat tat tat
thats just the way it is.
Are you impressed with my detective skills? My deductive reasoning? I am!
Either way I had a good LOL as i drove flinging shells like shrapnel down 66 and I couldn’t help be feel a little honored that someone would spent .98 cents and decent Grade A bleached eggs on me. I mean, I know i’m worth it but it’s nice to know someone else does too.
Oh and as a fun footnote, I let the parking attendant know to spread the good word to any fellow egg attack victims that they were not alone and that I would be hosting a support group on the 8th floor party room, and also wanted to give her a heads up of such matter. The conversation was word for word this:
Me: Oh thought you should know someone egged my car so theres a lot of yolk going on down on G2, I dont know if anyone else got it too or if the pleasure was all mine
Mamacita parking lady: OOOOOOOOO! It’s dripping?! They leak from ceiling?!
Me: What. No. WHAT? Eggs…on my hood…look…shells? eggs? breakfast? eggs.
Mamacita parking lady: AHH! yes! eggs! Yeah, people work here on weekend.
Mamacita parking lady: Where you park?
Me: G2, like right in front of building, plain view.
Mamacita parking lady: AHHHH yeah! You should park in the corners somewhere
Me: Corner spots are egg free zones?
Mamacita parking lady: So, it leaked from ceiling?
Me: Have a good night!
How many eggs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. Eggs don’t have hands.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a martian?
Did you hear the one about the egg?
It’s not all it’s “cracked” up to be!
Why can’t you tease egg whites?
They can’t take a yolk.
*Alternate ending: I’m told by my Period Tracker iphone app (FREE!) that I’m at my peak fertility on 2/14. I’m also told that in order to lock down a childs birth on 1/11/11, couples need to go hats off in the sack and make it sweet on Valentine’s Day. Everyone knows that i’m a sucker for a good fad date birth, so we pull the goalie and start a family together. tonight.
And that’s why I don’t do the planning on holidays.
me: thanks for saying hi!
me: sorry i whipped my hair back and forth at you
him: thats what you looked like
me: thats so accurate
him: a lambeosaurus
me: glad you had that dinosaur nomenclature ready to ride on google search
him: wait no
him: THATS what you looked like
me: damn that dinosaur is fierce looking. are you sure you want to give me that much credit? I’m sure i looked way more like
me: also known as FLOOF.
him: thats the one